I have a couple of recovering friends dealing with rejection from their spouse. Staying sober and fully connected to God through this kind of pain (and working on their own and not their wive’s recovery) is often their last hurdle to experiencing God, and not woman, as their Higher Power. Sometimes they get to keep their wives in the process.
Prior to marriage, I wish every man could gain such an affection for their Father in Heaven and their brothers, and make such everyday sexual and fantastical sacrifices to God as necessary, so as to, more and more, rise up and be Men of God. Then they can truly love their woman in the first place; not having this boyish dependence on her and her perceptions, feelings, views, and actions that I now so typically see in recovering men. And thus not have to go through the pain of growing up as married – or soon to be divorced – men.
Keep working on making the love and fear of God your primary compulsion and joy – and continue to find satisfaction in connecting and standing in the light – on equal footing – with your fellow man!!! I believe that more and more your unconscious feelings of obligation will more and more be to do God’s will in all things at all times and in all places! Be diligent and patient and very prayerful in this ongoing transformation.
