By: Christopher D. Adams, MFT
In 2009, the record was set for the longest marriage; Herbert and Zelmyra Fisher had been married for 85 years. When I heard this I was so impressed and so I began to search to find how they have been so successful. Marriage is hard for every couple at one point or another and I wanted to hear how they got through the hard times.
In an interview that they gave on Valentines Day, they answered 14 questions about their relationship and how their marriage could survive that long. As I read up on their journey I heard them discuss arguments that they have had over the years. Zelmyra cited a way toward success for them was “learning to bend, not break.”
As a marriage and family therapist, I spend a lot of time with individuals who are at their breaking point. The imagery of a straw that breaks the back of the proverbial camel is a visual that is discussed regularly in my office. If you are approaching that break point or you may even feel that you have been broken several times in the past, you deserve some help to know how to bend and not break. At Connections Counseling Service, we pride ourselves in helping couples to bend and repair their relationships before and after that straw has been placed on tired shoulders.
Herbert and Zelmyra remind us that, “marriage is not a contest – never keep a score. God has put the two of you together on the same team to win!”
If your marriage has become a contest, if you feel that not only are you loosing the game but that you are just getting too tired to play, please call us and set up a consultation. It is not too late to give it another shot. Let us help the two of you get back on the same team.
