Therapy for Porn Use, Sex Addiction & Unwanted Sexual Behavior
Therapy for pornography use, compulsive sexual behavior, and unwanted sexual behavior works on three fronts at once: weeding the patterns that are costing you, cultivating healthy sexuality, and becoming someone able to live it. At Connections Counseling, CSAT-certified therapists provide this care in Orem, Murray, and online across Utah. Free 30-minute consultations; most clinicians accept insurance.
A more complete approach to recovery
Most people come to treatment already knowing there are sexual behaviors or patterns they want to change: pornography, sexual acting out, secrecy, escalating behavior, broken commitments — a cycle that continues even when the consequences are painful.
Those patterns need to be addressed. But recovery cannot be built around stopping behavior alone.
At Connections Counseling, we work on both sides of recovery at the same time — addressing the patterns that are interfering with your life while actively developing the emotional, relational, and sexual capacities needed for a healthier way of living. You do not have to completely eliminate every unwanted behavior before you begin building something healthier. Stopping what is harming you and cultivating what you want your life to become belong together.
Many approaches to recovery emphasize only one side of the problem. Some focus primarily on stopping unwanted sexual behavior. Others focus primarily on developing greater sexual acceptance and health. We believe effective treatment needs both.
If we focus only on stopping the behavior, you may become better at avoiding something without developing the kind of life you want in its place. If we focus only on healthy sexuality without directly addressing destructive or compulsive patterns, the behaviors that brought you to treatment may continue.
Our approach brings these together. And as those changes are practiced over time, recovery begins to become part of how you live and who you understand yourself to be.
Find the therapist who's right for you
Take our quick, private assessment — answer a few simple questions and we'll match you with the Connections therapist best suited to what you're going through. About two minutes, and your answers never leave your device.
Lasting recovery requires three things working together throughout treatment. We call this the Becoming Model of Recovery — weeding what interferes, cultivating what is healthy, and becoming the person capable of living it.
The Becoming Model: two kinds of work, at the same time
1 · Weeding
Address the patterns that are keeping you stuck
Identifying triggers and high-risk situations
Developing clear behavioral boundaries
Interrupting secrecy and dishonesty
at the same time
2 · Cultivating
Develop healthy sexuality and healthy living
Learning healthier ways to care for yourself
Clarifying your values and what matters most to you
Developing meaningful relationships
practiced together over time
3 · Becoming
Change that becomes part of who you are
Healthier choices stop feeling like something you force yourself to do, and start feeling consistent with the person you are becoming.
1 · Weeding
Address the patterns that are keeping you stuck
We help you identify and change the sexual behaviors, patterns, beliefs, and circumstances that continue to pull you away from the life you want. Depending on your situation, this may include:
Identifying triggers and high-risk situations
Developing clear behavioral boundaries
Creating accountability and support
Interrupting secrecy and dishonesty
Learning to respond differently to urges
Developing healthier ways to regulate difficult emotions
Understanding patterns of escalation
Identifying beliefs and circumstances that contribute to the cycle
Repairing harmful patterns when appropriate
Building practical strategies for preventing a return to unwanted behavior
This work matters. But it is not the entire purpose of recovery. We are not simply trying to make the unwanted behavior disappear — we are also asking what needs to grow in its place.
2 · Cultivating
Develop healthy sexuality and healthy living
At the same time that unwanted patterns are being addressed, we help you actively develop the capacities associated with a healthy sexual life. This may include:
Learning healthier ways to care for yourself
Becoming more aware of your emotions and physical experience
Developing a healthier relationship with your body
Strengthening your sense of identity
Clarifying your values and what matters most to you
Learning to communicate with greater honesty and openness
Developing meaningful relationships
Increasing your ability to experience emotional intimacy
Developing healthy physical and sexual intimacy
Learning to experience sexual desire without automatically fearing, suppressing, or acting on it
Developing a sexual life that is intentional, connected, responsible, and consistent with your values
Recovery therefore asks two questions at the same time: what is interfering with the life I want, and what am I trying to build instead? These are not separate stages of treatment. They stay connected throughout the process.
3 · Becoming
Develop change that becomes part of who you are
Changing behavior and practicing healthier ways of living gradually begins to influence something deeper: the way you understand yourself and the kind of person you are becoming.
Many people have experienced periods in which they successfully stopped an unwanted behavior, only to eventually return to it. Lasting change requires more than temporary control. Therapy helps you understand the internal conflicts, beliefs, emotions, relational patterns, and familiar ways of responding that keep pulling you toward the old cycle. You then begin practicing new ways of living through your commitments, relationships, routines, boundaries, values, and daily choices.
Over time, healthier choices become less like something you are forcing yourself to do and more consistent with the way you want to live. Recovery becomes more than "I'm trying not to do this anymore." It begins to become "this is how I choose to live."
The goal is not to spend the rest of your life fighting against an unwanted sexual identity. The goal is to develop a healthy sexual self capable of living with greater freedom, integrity, connection, intimacy, and purpose.
What does working on both sides of change look like?
Throughout treatment, we keep returning to two interconnected questions. What needs to be addressed — what pattern, behavior, belief, circumstance, or way of responding is interfering with the life you want? And what needs to be developed — what emotional, relational, sexual, or personal capacity needs to grow so you can live differently?
That means during the same period you may be working to stop pornography or another unwanted sexual behavior, you may also be learning how to:
Manage difficult emotions
Strengthen your self-respect
Develop a healthier relationship with your body
Become more honest
Improve your relationships
Build emotional intimacy
Clarify your values
Experience healthy sexuality
Repair damaged trust
Create meaningful routines and commitments
One does not have to wait for the other. We address the pattern while cultivating the person you are becoming.
Is recovery the same as sobriety?
For some clients, establishing sobriety from particular sexual behaviors is an essential part of treatment. Those behavioral goals matter. But we don't believe the ultimate measure of recovery is simply how many days have passed since an unwanted behavior occurred.
We also want to know whether you are becoming more honest. Whether you are more able to tolerate difficult emotions without escaping. Whether you are developing greater self-awareness, becoming more connected to the people who matter to you, and learning to experience your body and sexuality in healthier ways. Whether you are more capable of intimacy, whether your choices are increasingly aligned with your values, and whether you are becoming someone who can sustain the life you want.
These are the signs that recovery is moving beyond behavior management and becoming a healthier way of living.
What does treatment actually involve?
Understanding yourself is important, but insight by itself does not necessarily create change. Our treatment for pornography use, compulsive sexual behavior, and unwanted sexual behavior is designed to help you translate insight into action. Depending on your needs, treatment may include:
Individual therapy with clinicians trained in sexual addiction and compulsive sexual behavior
Certified Sex Addiction Therapist (CSAT) treatment
Faith-sensitive therapy that respects your beliefs and values
Treatment is individualized to your circumstances rather than assuming everyone follows exactly the same path.
What does treatment look like over time?
Recovery develops over time. Early treatment usually places greater emphasis on creating stability, understanding your behavioral patterns, establishing appropriate boundaries, and developing greater control. At the same time, you begin identifying the healthier life you are trying to create.
As treatment progresses, the work often deepens into understanding yourself, addressing the conflicts that maintain the old pattern, developing healthier emotional and relational capacities, and strengthening intimacy and sexual health. Eventually the question becomes less about simply stopping a behavior and more about learning how to consistently live in a way that reflects who you want to be.
You won't be expected to change everything at once. We help you identify what needs your attention now while keeping sight of where recovery is ultimately taking you.
What makes Connections different?
You shouldn't have to choose between an approach that takes compulsive or destructive sexual behavior seriously and an approach that recognizes sexuality as an important part of a healthy human life. We believe treatment needs both.
We don't view recovery as eliminating sexuality or teaching you to avoid sexual desire. And we don't believe developing healthy sexuality means ignoring behaviors that are harming you or the people you love. Instead, we help you address what is harming you, cultivate what is healthy, understand what keeps pulling you back, practice a different way of living, and develop change that becomes increasingly consistent with who you are becoming.
That is the direction of recovery.
Who is on the CSAT treatment team?
Connections Counseling has clinicians with specialized training in pornography use, sexual addiction, compulsive sexual behavior, betrayal trauma, relationships, and sexual health. Our team includes Certified Sex Addiction Therapists (CSATs) who have completed additional training in assessing and treating problematic and compulsive sexual behavior.
Specialized training matters because sexual behavior often intersects with many different areas of a person's life, including:
Emotional regulation
Trauma
Shame
Relationships
Attachment
Sexual development
Religious and personal values
Marriage and partnership
Identity
Intimacy
Treatment should be able to address the unwanted behavior without losing sight of the whole person.
What does treatment cost, and is it covered?
Most of our therapists are in network with Select Health, Blue Cross Blue Shield (BCBS), DMBA, and EMI Health, and we'll verify your benefits before you begin.
One thing is worth knowing up front so nothing comes as a surprise: group therapy is not covered by insurance. Our recovery groups are paid directly at a flat monthly rate rather than billed to your plan.
If coverage matters to your decision, tell us during your free consultation and we'll match you with a therapist who takes your plan. Care is available in Orem, Murray, and online across Utah.
You can build more than a life without the behavior
Recovery is not simply about becoming someone who no longer does something. It is about becoming more capable of living with intention — more honest, more connected, more emotionally present, more capable of intimacy, more aligned with your values, and more comfortable experiencing yourself as a healthy sexual person.
You can work on changing the unwanted pattern while beginning to build that life now. Meet with one of our specialized therapists to talk about what has been happening, what you want to change, and the kind of life you want to create.
“In the months since I've started therapy, I feel more capable of dealing with life, more confident in myself as a man, and more hopeful that I'll be able to overcome my addictions. Thank you!”
Find the therapist who's right for you
Take our quick, private assessment — answer a few simple questions and we'll match you with the Connections therapist best suited to what you're going through. About two minutes, and your answers never leave your device.
No. We work with people who use a variety of terms for their experience, including sex addiction, pornography addiction, compulsive sexual behavior, problematic pornography use, and unwanted sexual behavior. Some clients find the addiction framework helpful; others do not. The label matters less than accurately understanding what is happening and building an effective treatment plan.
Many people find that sobriety gets harder, not easier, once they begin real recovery work. That is not a sign it is failing. It is usually a sign it is working.
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We Help Verify Your Benefits
We take the stress out of billing. We'll verify your insurance and review copays with you before your first visit.
Select Health
Blue Cross Blue Shield
DMBA
EMI Health
Out-of-Network Superbills
Find the therapist who's right for you
Take our quick, private assessment — answer a few simple questions and we'll match you with the Connections therapist best suited to what you're going through. About two minutes, and your answers never leave your device.
